Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in it's just us bitches' LiveJournal:

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Monday, April 17th, 2006
5:20 am	KENNEL IS KIND OF LIKE SAILING ON A CIGARETTE my cat had a birthday we cooked it soup a bear ate it we named the bear picasso and then kissed him on the mouth LONG STORY SHORT I HAVE A PET BEAR NAMED PICASSO WE MAKE OUT LIKE WHOA (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Friday, April 14th, 2006
6:26 pm	ABOUT A BEER WHAT ELSE IS I"M SICK OF THESE FUCKING WHORE SLUTS WHO EVERY TIME I HIT A BUTTON IT SAYS "this journal is friends only" FUCKING I WILL SODOMIZE A PIG!!!!!! (Comment on this)
6:18 pm	SUCK SUCK SUCK A POEM ABOUT A MONKEY: sleeping pills all they seem to do is make me maniacal and a bit beautiful A POEM ABOUT A HORSE: sleeping pills once in a while they sort of make me want to crash my car A POEM ABOUT A SPERM DONAR: to be a sperm donar there is some sort of fancy height requirement that is to say don't want no short short man A POEM ABOUT A COMPUTER JOURNAL: such creations are about as fun as anal sex on a beach with a pinecone MORE LATER ON THE POETRY I'VE FINALLY FOUND MY NICHE MY CALLING MY MEANING OF LIFE! p.p.s- paid account options: post by phone. are you for serious livejournal? are you really? (Comment on this)
Thursday, April 6th, 2006
11:39 pm	a rooster sits on a roof facing north. it lays an egg. which way does it roll? people who get haircuts that make them look like penises maybe neet to be told: "you look like a sex organ" (Comment on this)
Saturday, April 1st, 2006
5:57 am	myabe sti em utb i kown taht im gnoing to bealate BUT ABOUT MY PET GOAT HE ATE CAFFEINE PILLS HE MARRIED YOUNG WHEN ONCE A BICYCLE RACE CAME CRAWLING DOWN HE WAS SOMEWHAT OF A SASSY THING (Comment on this)
Monday, February 27th, 2006
6:12 am	SCREEN DOORS ! I'm WORRIED ABOUT TODDLERS (Comment on this)
6:10 am	UPDATE TWICE IN ONE CADILLAC HAVE A LIVE (Comment on this)
6:01 am	SAMANTHA IS A PORN STAR AND ANGEL IS A CENTERFOLD i knew that one day ONE DAY HARRY i'd have a birthday a birthday to top all mexican pizzas all ice cream floats root beer vagina's and sex on a subway. IN A FUNNY HAT NONETHELESS. NONETHELESS AND MOREOVER AND WHATSOEVER AND NOWANDAGAINANDFOREVERANDADAY. It's pretty funny when you use a livejournal type thing and it's pretty funny to be pretty funny when the groceries need WATERING YOU FUCKING FILTHY FUCKING WHORE FUCK YOU! (Comment on this)
Wednesday, October 26th, 2005
8:49 pm	You are probably taking your life too serious. people probably dislike you more than you realize. tonight, while walking through the mall, i slapped an aligator with my vagina of a penis. Right in the kisser. Security arrived. Parrots squaked: "What about the celebration! Squak! What about the celebration?!" They said. I thought about leaving, but the smell of freshly baked cookies kept me around, as I hadn't eaten in days by this time. There was a man named dog. A dog named billy. A billy club clocked me in the face, I woke up in a holding cell in protective custody for my own good. i only wanted to have some fun. All I wanted to do was have some fun. I just wanted to jhave some fun. Why can I never just have some fun. Good times food fight the good times the good times the food fight is killing me! saturnalia ha ha it's like las vegas is screaming our creed! (4 Comments |Comment on this)
Monday, October 3rd, 2005
4:19 pm	you all are whores (Comment on this)
Sunday, September 11th, 2005
1:54 pm	satyr sat alone all day i've lost some weight i'm feeling better there are plenty of job opportunities for a fine gentleman like yourself feet still twitch, head hurts, prescriptions will run out in time and i'm sure you'll all survive. just loot the damn place. (mythical ethical iceicle tricicle)! (Comment on this)
Monday, August 22nd, 2005
4:10 pm	saddle up Yesterday there were six bags left in the pizza house. We took liberties with laps and sized.... Wait, hold on a minute. Hold it right there. We're gonna go watch a baseball game. Thanks to who gonna is a word. Who? 50 g's. Thanks for all the ammunition. We'll have a powwow. Smack him for me, he's a champion of mustard seeds wasted on the ground. (Comment on this)
Saturday, August 20th, 2005
1:04 pm	WILSON THE ONLY CHILDREN OF A WHORE WHO WAS ALLOWED ADMITTANCE INTO THE FINEST SPECTACLE OF DEBACLE OF ORACLE WAS ONLY LAUGHING ON THE INSIDE BECAUSE HER WOMB WAS A TOMB AND HER BRAIN HAD LIATERS AND SYNAPSES BURNT! tastes like chalk to me said Syranac tastes like chalk to me (Comment on this)
Thursday, August 18th, 2005
1:15 pm	GLAD NEY TO HELP YEEE!!!! you've got your HEAD in the clouds and you're not at all what you seeeeeeeemmM@!M!MM!M!M!M!!!!!!! YOAUR AOSUNOINSF and you're somebody int hanksgiving ritua l of the on ly daughter wanter criminal and a body of a water a water a water! (Comment on this)
Sunday, August 14th, 2005
4:25 pm	traveling traveling traveling traveling traveling traveling sick is a nuisance traveling sick is a nuisance nuisance and misery nuisance and swine! (2 Comments |Comment on this)
2:34 pm	sassy seranador licorice holes in my wetsuit make for daring party snacks not TV DINNERS! (Comment on this)
Sunday, July 31st, 2005
11:15 am	naked women remind me of sesame street and cake i'm not afraid of anything be it man or beast. bleeding skin or surround sound. either way i'll win the championship and design myself a pirate spectacle while sleeping with the captain of this ship. (Comment on this)
10:24 am	FAT FAT FAT who said luther vandross was an innuendo? he's filled with steak. and whether or not saddness is a flavor is determined by the DIRECTIONS GIVEN TO US BY THE MEAK WILL INHERIT THE EARTH! (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Wednesday, July 27th, 2005
12:37 pm	saskatoon my planet is small catamarando macho man takes full lance habit as felt filled cats smack trash at a rabbit while I smoke tolls through suicide ridge I aint met a man I couldn't outlive I never met a god I never met a woman I never met a god i could not be loved by never met a god met a woman met a god met a woman met a woman met a woman met a fish (Comment on this)
Sunday, July 24th, 2005
8:12 pm	sac re LIGious tomorrow morning we were cruising at a steady altitude of seventy five thousand hectars when suddenly BLAM POLICE K9 UNITS EVEN THE MAN WHO PLAYS SANTA CLAUSE WERE THERE. it was hilarious until spencer the whale dropped a 10 pound note from the washing machine of a roadside berry hawker. chaos ensued. people were pissed. very pissed. we steadied ourselves against the oak trees nearby. alligators emerged from the swamp, checked out the noise. people were pissed. nobody in sight had a cigarette. everybody had matches. we wondered what intangible forces might be trying to tell us something our fragile minds couldn't handle or grasp. after years of faithfully and concistently abusing our bodies, all we craved was booze. sleep wasn't even an option. women appeared. heads shaved, sporting identical tattoos above their navels. letters and numbers, some sort of tracking code, identification marker. at the rate we were going insurance wasn't something we considered as a part of reality. and who would afford it if we did? we left no footprints. we had no souls. we broke windows and hearts, smeared blood on the bar stools and saddled up horses in winter. the golden age would be our friend again. (Comment on this)